Life Itself

Life...Wow. Not something I'm enjoying a whole lot right now. But its ok, not perfect, not great, but ok. I'm making it through, which is prolly one of the most important things. Life ( esp. when you're a teenager) is like a battle, some get through it just fine, others have a bit of trouble, maybe some gun fire, but they make it. Still others can only make it through those years barely, just barely. and They have the cuts and scars to prove it. I dont know which type I am yet. Sure I have scars, but they're not real noticeable. I guess thats good sometimes, like when i meet new people. I wouldnt want them staring at my arms or something. But then there are those Times when I want a scar, a marking so deep it will never heal. So i can look back and remember the pain. Yeah, its weird, sometimes i only think of the scar as a way to remember the pain, not get rid of it. I read this great book, The Runner, Its about a guy named Bullet and he's a cross country runner. Theres something about it that makes me want to meet him, makes me wish that he wasnt some fictional character. I have the feeling that if I met him in real, true, life I would make him my best friend. That saddens me, that He isnt real. He reminds me of someone, when I figure out who, I will tell... Hmm something that is really eating me up right now is boys. Yeah, im a teen age girl who called herself beautiful and now I'm talking about boys. No, Im not some vain prep girl who cant get enough of herself. Thats not it at all. I just have some weird Charm that guys seem to eat up. But thats beside the point. So theres this one guy, who I like..A lot! like so much i can hardly breathe when im around him. We both left this summer, to go and work different places. When he left, I knew he liked me and I'm pretty sure he knew I liked him. But when I come back, it seems he has a girlfriend, but i dont know if hes lying or not. So yeah I dont know what to do. I think Im going to tell him anyways. But he doesnt speak English as a first language, which makes me worried how much we'll be able to communicate about our feelings. Now we do fine, talking and laughing but who knows??? I dont speak Burmese at all.. well, like a one over a gazillionth percent which is really, really, small.. so yeah thats sucks...But I dont know what to do. Ive never really had boy trouble like this. But my gut is telling me to go for it, even if i get burned. and most of the time, my gut is right. so yeah, but im still nervous... Thats it for now i guess...Who would read about my life, i have no clue. When i talk about it, it seems so much more fun. And since you prolly dont know me, well it seems even more distant, maybe like a fairy tale...see you soon ok? ^.^ <3 Hla ThaZin

Thats me!! The Pale one, with two of my best friends!! Wai Wai and El Nay. Don't worry, I'm sure you'll hear about them soon. We're farmers, chewing on our weed, haha!!